Joinin' The Grayhairs For Some Sinnin'

Tomorrow, Jimbo and I are heading south for the evening to do some sinnin' in the closest place it is safe to do it. Oklahoma. We're gonna hit the one armed bandits with our friends, Daryl & Sharla. But before we go, Daryl has promised me a ride on his brand new Harley. Its pretty sweet. I'm pretty stoked. (If I wasn't so short and afraid of laying one over, I'd take some motorcycle riding classes......shorty doesn't want to make an ass of herself, though.)

Back to the slots. If you're strong enough to hug it out with the little old ladies for a machine at some of those smaller casinos, its not so bad. Those gals are MEAN. When they find one they like, there's no letting go of it! Damn!

I'm not much of a gambling girl, in fact, most times I find myself making deals with God under my breath if He'll just let me hit the big one - JUST ONCE! ........it never happens.

Wild,Wild Garrison Life!

Some crazy stuff has happenend the last couple of nights at the Garrison's garrison.

Sunday night, I was doing some laundry and noticed what first appeared to be more cats (again) in the backyard. (Sorry, cat lovers, you know my take on cats) I of course got mad and started for the back kitchen door, cussing all the way, when I realized, they were RACCOONS! SIX, VERY LARGE, RACCOONS!! And one baby.

They were just passing thru in broad daylight (it was around 7:30 p.m.) and they didn't seem too concerned with us!

I've never seen Jim get so excited about anything like these damn raccoons. He started jumping up and down and squealing "Get the camera! Get the camera! Thats so cool!"

I'm going to assume that there are 2 main reasons why they were in our neighborhood: we live very near the river, and there are some big-ass trash containers out back of the Dillons directly behind our house. (we share the retaining wall with them). At any rate, I didn't mind them showing up.....they scared off another cat!

So last night, our electrical box door flew open again (I've blogged about this before) and for some reason, we have a wall decoration in that keeps falling off the wall and landing in the middle of the kitchen. I think the house agrees with me that the kitchen HAS to be remodeled soon! (blegh....I hate that kitchen.) Its the ONLY room not yet remodeled, and it makes me crazy.

This morning was boobie biopsy day. It was scary as hell, and I'm in a lot of pain. The doctor was super cool. (and cute!) He accidentally hit a little blood vessel, and 4 hours later, I'm still trying to get the small incision to stop bleeding. They gave me some adorable little ice packs to cram into my bra as well.......oooohh...chilly!

Should have some results in a couple of days!

Bowling!

Last night, Jimbo and I drove out east to Thunderbird Bowl, for his company's CHRISTMAS PARTY. (I shit you not....7 months late. Outstanding.)

Here's Jim and some of his co-workers.
I was smart to TAKE the picture and not be IN it!!

It was a lot of fun! I forgot how much I LOOOOVE to bowl. And I've still got it, if I may say so myself! I think I may have to start hitting the lanes again on the regular. It was a blast.

I Love this picture of Jim.
He looks like a little kid, wondering where the ball went.

Jim's boss, Clint, was INCREDIBLY intoxicated, but oddly,
it didn't effect his game.

Ah, there's the stuff - that which makes Jim think he's a professional bowler.

Today, my left butt cheek and right arm are killing me, but it was a real good time, and I think we may be visiting Thunderbird again real soon! They've got some "Extreme Bowling" that looks like fun, fun, fun.....and right up my alley! (Pun INTENDED.)

The Boobs Again!

I FINALLY heard back from my doctor's office about the mass in lefty.

It took a while to get approval from our FABULOUS insurance provided by the Big Bird, as the needle they need is only at Via Christi St. Francis, and well, they weren't going to allow it.

But they are now. (I love my doctor....he REALLY looks out for me.)

So 7a.m. Tuesday morning, its off to the biopsy. (I HATE needles.)

I can't have ANY kind of pain killer or anything that might thin my blood till then, and NO ALCOHOL?!?! What the heck?!?! (this is a crisis situation, people!)

I'm not sure how I feel about all of this. It seems everyone I know that has had something biopsied has nothing but trouble to follow. Its not so much a fear of cancer, things have changed and the survival rate is good....I just don't have time for this mess.

**UPDATE**
ITS OKAY TO DRINK!!!!!! Just no aspirin. Right on.

The Dark Knight.

Well, we didn't make it to the drag races tonight. I hit a snafu at work that caused me to be a tad later than I had planned, and Jimbo spent the day moving his brother's things to the new apartment. We were both bushed.

So we found ourselves caught up in the race to a good seat at the only showing of the latest Batman installment that wasn't sold out...the 8:45.

I have some advice, should you decide to go see it:

1.) If you love Heath Ledger, RUN, don't walk to your nearest theater, right now.

2.) DON'T VISIT THE CONCESSION STAND. The film is over 3 hours long.....I made the mistake of taking a diet soda in with me. (my left butt cheek is permanently numb, as well, I think.)

I would love to know what Jack Nicholson thinks of Heath's performance as the Joker. Cause Heath tore it UP!! I don't think I've ever seen a character that can scare the hell out of you and make you laugh out loud at the same time like this new Joker. FABULOUS. Genius even, if I may say so.

In one scene, he makes reference to a person's true character just before they die. Its one of those moments that makes you say wow, and choke up for just a second, because its coming from a young man who is, well, dead, and who died way too soon. He was amazing in this flick.

His very last scene in the film, also makes you feel a twinge of sadness, because you feel that this character can never be this insanely devious and funny, ever again, (how on earth could anyone else top this?) and this is might the last time you'll see Heath Ledger on the big screen.
If he isn't even MENTIONED come Oscar season, it'll be a crime. (no pun intended.)

Starbucks, Pink Dice, Silver Hearses......

I stopped in at Starbucks yesterday morning on my way to work for a tasty coffee beverage, and found myself waiting for my order with Larry Hatteberg, of KAKE Channel 10 fame. He looks much younger in person, by the way.
Everyone was staring. I felt really bad for him, but it wasn't his fault, poor guy - he had no idea he was standing in the same room with THE Rockyn Robyn.

This morning, before I headed in to work, I slipped over to Hobby Lobby to pick up some provisions.....no more dice beads! What the heck?!.....I'm usually in there on a Monday or Tuesday, and its quiet. This morning the place was full of your garden variety weekend soccer mom crafties and little old ladies....I think I was a bit much for 'em.....I felt like everyone was gawking at me. So the trip was a bust.
But thats okay, because I may have found a new spot for beads and such!
My friend Jennifer at work pointed me in the direction of this SWEET website for buying beads wholesale, and I'm so grateful! Its called BeadGiant.com

Lookie what I found!!! Pink dice beads!

And Heather, check it out! Hearse charms!!!!
(I'm all over it, babe.)

If I keep this up, who knows? Maybe I COULD start my own little shop of jewelry oddities someday, and the old gray hairs will be shopping at MY place.

I'm a little bummed this weekend. My Special Olympics team went to Winfield for the State Softball Tourney. I didn't coach it this year, and I'm stuck here at work anyway, but dang, I miss that miserable heat, the sunburn, the sweat, the dirt, and the stinky uniform duty. Its a chore, but I love it. And I'm really missing it this year. Maybe next time.
BUT! I think I have just the thing to cheer me up! I gotta get Jimbo to take me to the drag races this evening! That sounds perfectly stinky, dirty and miserable!!! PICTURES TO COME, OF COURSE!!

God Bless the Bitchy Boys on Cable.

I currently have two very serious addictions. Dirty little secrets even.

While my SciFi boys, Jay & Grant on Ghost Hunters are on hiatus, I've been watching a LOT of Bravo. Mostly Flipping Out and Shear Genius.

Jeff Lewis on Flipping Out is so obsessive compulsive in his home remodels, its nuts. Have you seen this guy?! Last season I didn't care much for him, but this season, I love the dude. Bitchy, bossy, completely insane. Love him! Sometimes he does and says some stuff that makes complete sense to me...thats kinda scary.

Shear Genius is the bombdiggity! Its a competition show for hair stylists, and let me tell you - there is nothing better than a bitchy stylist. I forget this little blonde boy's name, but he's from Dallas, TX, and I just wanna shove him in my pocket and and take him home. Of all the stylists, he's the least bitchy (so far).

Don't get me wrong - I really miss my Ghost Hunters. I'm all about the paranormal. But bitchy boys are keeping my summer interesting until the spooky stuff comes back. These guys are GREAT!

Man, I'd be so lost without cable.

Other People's Money.

I love spending it. Other people's money that is.

Let me back up.

My brother-in-law (Jim's twin brother), Tim, to those who do not know, is developmentally disabled, but a year or so ago, Jim and I got him out of Mama's house (he's 38, for Heaven's sake) and into his own place, living independently for the most part...with the exception of Jim and I getting his bills paid, groceries bought (one of us drives him to get groceries every week or so)....the whole shebang...all with his own money. He works at Dillons and of course, gets a Social Security supplemental check, so the dude's checking account is fatter than ours. Its just sick. And because he gets that little chunk from the government, if he has too MUCH money, they start cutting it back. (thats just wrong...how's he suppose to have a "normal" life if he can't have money?!) So Jim has to either hide it in a savings account or take him out shopping for new stuff. (this is VERY hard for Jim who sometimes thinks if you can't eat it or wear it, its not worth spending the money on.)

At any rate, he had a swell little girlfriend he was living with for a while, she too is very high functioning, drives a car.....good gal.

But like any "normal" guy will do, he got lazy and comfortable, and sat around on his duff and expected her to do all the housework, the cooking, the laundry...sound familiar ladies?!

Well, she got fed up and moved out. And unfortunately, everything was hers. So we had to go sofa shopping with him....

Thats a good start, but we've got miles to go still, and as a bachelor, his idea of "nice" and my idea of "nice" are two WAY different things. And its SOOOO much fun shopping when its not YOUR money thats getting spent. Jim wants his brother to live as "normal" as possible, but I think most days, Tim doesn't care - as long as the cable is on (its either WWE Wrestling or Walker Texas Ranger) and there's food in the fridge, its all good.

Next on the list is a full size bed. Tim could care less, but it drives Jim crazy that he's still sleeping on a twin.

Ahh....to be that happy with what you already have.......I could learn something from him, for sure.

Behold, Big Daddy's Tattoo. (But He's No Tough Guy.)

Well, a photographer, I am not. But here are a few shots of Jim's ink.

It actually is very nice, but my photos leave
something to be desired.

Of course, its only been 2 days, so its lumpy and gross,
but after it heals, it will be a thing of beauty!

But the tat didn't change him.....just to uphold his reputation of being a big softy, read on.....

Last night, after work, Jimbo met me over at Emerson's for a beer and an appetizer before we headed over to the Moonlight Car Show downtown. Halfway through my chicken strips, I'm getting full. I look out the window, and see that I have a clear view of the homeless gentleman that sits/sleeps/hangs out on the bench in front of the Big Bird.

I say to Jim, "Wow, I feel like a real turd. I'm leaving a LOT of food on my plate and there's our resident homeless guy on the bench across the street who probably hasn't had much to eat today."

(I hate how everyone ignores this guy. They don't even make eye contact or say hello when they pass by.)

Jim asks the waitress for a to-go box and says to me "Box it up. I'll take it over and offer it to him."

Off we go across Douglas to strike up a casual conversation with the slightly strange, but otherwise nice dude. Jim asks "Hey there, bud, how's it going?"

Dude looks up at the sky and says, "let me ask you something, brother. Why is it the clouds move one direction one day and then a whole other direction the next?"

Jim replies, "This is Kansas, man, you can't ever tell what the heck the weather's gonna do."

Awkward silence.

Jim speaks again. "Say, pal, have you had a bite to eat yet today?"

Dude: "Not really, but something always comes along."

Jim: "Well, my wife and I were just across the street for dinner and this stuff is just too good not to share, would you like to have some? Its chicken strips."

Dude smiles: "Hey, thanks man, I appreciate that."

Jim: "No problem, bud, you have a good night!"

THIS is why I fell for that stubby little hillbilly. Whenever I get irritated at him for something stupid, I need to remember the times he does things like this. And he does things like this a lot.

Its a Done Deal.

Well, kids, Jimbo did it. He's officially INKED. (I'll post a picture of it later) It looks great, and I gotta tell ya, the dude Heather suggested to us was FANTASTIC.

We made an appointment at the new place out on West Kellogg, Undisputed Tattoo, owned and operated by Marcus Aday & Tom Siefert.

Here's the scene of the crime. Their shop is an old Taco Tico, but their stations were very nice, and they are still remodeling. (the cleanliness of the ladies room was startling - I was pleasantly surprised and impressed...they even had provisions on hand.) Marcus did Jim's tattoo. he was SO nice. Very laid back, really great guy. I say, if you've never had a tattoo, and you're thinking about it - Marcus is the guy you want. He makes you feel like a friend, he's very talented, he's not at all heavy handed, and he's funny as hell! Super nice guy.

I'll post a photo of Bad Boy's fresh ink later - it turned out NICE! He's already planning the next one! (I told him it was easy to get hooked.)

Jimbo's Getting De-Flowered!

And its about time! That boy needs to get inked! He's ready for his first tattoo! I hope his dear sweet mother doesn't think that I'm some sort of dirty influence on him. She's never said a negative thing about all of mine, though, so I think we're safe.

He asked me to put together something that paid homage to his late father's military days. Jim's family is heavy on the military history....he served, his father, ALL of his uncles, his grandfathers all served......its kind of a big deal. Especially in the Vietnam department. Jimbo, on the other hand, only has one claim to fame. He was the tank driver (as seen on CNN) that rammed the wall at the Waco stand-off several years ago.

ANYHOOO.... here's what I came up with:

It's his dad's military stripes, and at the bottom, "Master Sergeant, Eddy Joe Garrison (there's that hillbilly name again)

Jim's thrilled. He's got it planned for his right arm, above the elbow. I think we may try to get this done over the weekend. If we do, count on pictures to come!!!!
(Dang it, now I've got the old ink itch again....)

Things Got Dicey Today!

Ah, I love a rainy day off. I call it the old movies, useless hobby piddlin' on the couch day.

So thats just what I did! A while back, my good buddy Heather had told me about some dice bracelets she saw at a car show down in Oklahoma one weekend that the vendor was asking way too much for, and I thought, hey! We can do that ourselves for WAY cheaper! So yesterday I headed down to the Hobby Lobby for some beads.

I love making bracelets, and I haven't done it in a while, but today was a perfectly crummy day for doing some stringing!

I forgot how much I love doing it, but I also forgot I was dangerously low on wire for my new venture, so I only pounded out 4 today.

Maybe Heather and I should open a jewelry/art/coffee/sandwich/cocktails place where cool people can hang out and be groovy. Something retro, for sure.

NIGHTMARE NECROLOGIES!

CRAAAAAPOLA. Death was not my friend today. (Heather, I think I've lost my mind.)

Today, the 4th of July silence at the Obituary Desk caught up with me, as EVERYONE apparently decided to kick it on the 4th, and today the funeral homes were back to work! And they have spent AAAALLLLL day revising stuff, adding stuff, deleting stuff, sending all NEW stuff... I was so busy from the moment I got to work to the end of the day that I didn't even get a chance to potty! Not once!!!

I swear, its feast or famine at the old Death Dealer's Desk. And I am wore OUT!

I had some serious goofiness today.....2 families WAITING outside in their cars and VERY impatient when I had to get everything up and going before I could help them, a survivor by the name of "Johnny Walker" (thats just funny stuff right there) and another by the name of "Mickey Thompson" (thats a drag slick), a deceased by the name of "Willie Walling" (I'm not kidding) and a grandchild by the name of "Thumper" (God, I hope thats a nickname)....crazy phone calls from folks trying to find out if someone died because they haven't heard from them in a while.....????????? Are ya' kidding me?!?! We get those kinda calls once in a while, but 3 or 4 in one day?! Nuts, I tell ya'.

And I don't know about Miss Heather, but I have had SOOOO many little kids, toddlers and infants lately, its depressing as hell. What's a goin' on?!?!

Ahhh......Mommy need drinkie, stat.

**Sigh**

Today I find myself, on this fantastic 4th of July, back at the Obituary Desk, dealin' death. Only thing that really sucks about it is NOBODY'S DYING TODAY!!! You may not see that as a problem, but for six torturous hours......its pretty lame. I like to be busy. Thats bad for humanity, though, I know.

So once again, I'm doodling.

I think my hand and my brain (now that its not swollen anymore!!) are actually starting to get it together! There's hope for me yet.

**UPDATE**
ITS NOW SATURDAY AND I'M GETTIN' SLAMMED! I THINK EVERYONE THOUGHT WE WERE CLOSED ON THE 4TH!!!!! YIIIIIIIKES.