Jeff's 50th Birthday Bash

Tonight Jimbo, Becky and I went over to Quincy's for a surprise birthday party for our friend Jeff. He has coached Special Olympics with us in the past.

He turns 50 tomorrow, eternally single, good guy.

The cake said "Relax, I'm Just Here for the Cake"


Here's the birthday boy.
It was a good night! I was worried that I had ruined the suprise because the e-card I sent him went a day earlier than it should have!!........but he was suprised enough!

AND.....Kids say the darnedest things....my very smart, never misses a thing 16 year old daughter professed to me tonight that when she and her two best girlfriends all turn 18, they're all "going out and getting matching tattoos".....when I asked her "where, exactly, do you plan on getting this done?"....she said "ummmm...at the tattoo parlor?"

I'm not sure who the idiot is...me for even asking or her for giving me that answer.

Tough Girls Rock.

Last night, Jimbo and I went to see the new Angelina Jolie flick, Wanted.

It was a tad bloody for my taste, and I got a little confused about halfway through it, but the music was AWESOME (I must have that soundtrack) and Angelina Jolie is such a tough ass, you gotta love her. I think if I had to kiss a girl, it would be her. She's scary yet sexy.

Most of her tattoos in the movie were actually hers, but some were fakes - check out the Robyn art on her hand!! Thats pretty cool. Anyone need a tattoo designed by Rocky Robyn?! I may have to get crackin' on something for myself like this!
At any rate, it was darkly humorous with a good laugh at "working for the man", so to speak, which I enjoyed along with the wicked awesome music, but if you wanna see it, I'd probably wait for it to hit DVD.

BOOBS! - Revisited.

Thats a funny title, huh.

Well, the ultrasound went just as I thought it would. Not good, but not bad.

The mass is solid and has a "suspicious" shape to it. So of course, there were words thrown around like "MRI" and my fav......"biopsy"........damn it. I'm praying for the MRI. (less invasive)

So the doctor's office was suppose to call me this afternoon to tell me which way they wanna proceed......I had to call them (I was freaking out)

Their records showed that I had another mammo, and the ultrasound was cancelled. (Tell that to lefty - she got slimed with the cold goo and pushed around on. Tons of fun. ) Ummm...okay, we had a radiologist consult us afterward, so go find his ass!!!!

Their going to call me on Monday.

BOOBS!

So tomorrow I have another visit to the doctor's office. This time for an ultrasound on old lefty, to see if the mass they found on my mammogram is "a solid or fluid" and "what we're dealing with."

After hearing that, all I can think about is that chewing gum from back in the day that was full of gooey stuff that would burst out when you bit down on it.

Nice visual, huh.

Anyhoo, I'm still a tad freaked out about it. If they had not shown me the x-rays, I wouldn't be. But to see it, in all its stark raving whiteness on that film.....creepy.

So I'll keep y'all ABREAST of the situation. HAHAHAHA!!!! C'mon. That's funny.

Frustrated Arteeest.

In my quest to learn the old school art of pinstriping, I've become a bit worried. I'm not sure I can make my hand stop doing this, instead:

I LOVE to doodle. It makes me feel free. It makes me feel creative. It makes me feel like I've gone to some untapped place in my brain. It makes me think clearer. But I'm starting to wonder if it's the fumes from the Sharpie!
Perhaps I should stick to what I know and go get myself some poster board and a pen down at the Wal-Mart! Lord know its a cheaper medium!
Tomorrow morning, I'll go back to getting a good feel for that pinstriping brush, but for now.....HELLO SHARPIE, my dear, sweet, non-judgemental friend!

Concussed!

Or thats what they tell me. Most of the day Tuesday, though, I was sore, but fine.

On Wednesday afternoon, Jimbo had to take me to see my doctor, as the effects of my fall off the step the day before were starting to take effect. Dizzy, blurred vision, queeeeeezy......not to mention the POUNDING, RINGING HEADACHE!

So after several x-rays and some stupid off the cuff questions about the day and date (thats not fair! I work for a newspaper! I never know what the date actually is!), it was determined that I had a nasty concussion. The doctor said by the looks of it, the bang to my head should have knocked me out cold. He said it takes about 24 hours for your brain to swell and for things to get tight up there in yer' noggin before you start to notice that stuff ain't quite right.

Well, needless to say, Jimbo feels like a jerk for not fixing that step when I mentioned it a few months ago.

The doctor gave me a tongue lashing for sitting in front of a computer for 2 days after and a work release form, demanding that I stay on bed rest till the 26th.

I laughed at him. (It made my head hurt, though.) So I got him talked into 2 days down, no TV, no reading, no computer and then I can go to work.

So today I'm going nuttier than squirell poo! I'm not a sit-arounder, and bed rest is the funniest 2 words I've ever heard! But I'm staying as low profile as possible, just to keep Jimbo quiet, because he's acting like I'm terminal.

As long as I don't let the Tylenol wear off, and I don't get too active, I think I'll be fine. If I horse around too much, the head starts a'poundin'!

And no TV, my foot! Fire in the Sky is on....I forgot how scary the thought of being abducted by aliens is!!!

Is This Monday?!

It sure felt like it.

This morning, Karma gave me the finger. I'm not sure why.

On my way out of the house to go meet co-workers for a carpool trip to some training, I stepped down onto a mobile step in the garage (it covers the crawl space access) and up it flipped, along with me, my coffee, my purse and its contents....I broke my ass (there's a huge crack in it now, teehee...and I gigantic purple bruise), dumped coffee all over myself, got a knot on my noggin, and a fat ugly goose egg on my thigh. Jimbo had to help me up - I could barely move. When he asked me (repeatedly) if I was okay, all I could utter was "I ASKED you to fix that!"

Well, even though I'm sore as hell, smelling like a wet dog latte and tore up from the floor up, the day actually came around for me.

Soo....later.....

I took Cowgirl & Linda's advice and headed down to my local GoodWill. I found these FABULOUSLY retro blue plates and this wicked awesome metal kleenex box cover to paint on. The plates were $.28 a piece, the box cover $.99 - woohooooo!! I love a deal.

And on top of that, I got this adorable little purse for FREE, cause the kid at the register thought it was my actual purse. Fool! I'll not attempt to paint on this one, I like it just the way it is!

AND THEN.......I got home and the old Elvis flick, Girl Happy, was on TMC!! FUN!!!!! I love that one....then Spinout!!!! Another good one.

AND NOW.....Heather and her hubcap just might be sliding over to deliver a little project for me! OOOHHHH.....I love presents!

So the day was not lost like my ass and my coffee after all, but I'm glad its almost over.

New Project, Day 1.

Well, today I started tinkering with enamel paints and pinstriping brushes - mostly because I'd like to learn how to pinstripe, but also because I'd like to find a new medium for my doodling, which up to now was all done with a Sharpie on very heavy paper, cardboard, etc.

Well, on accident today, things happenend pretty much like I thought they would.

My hands just did what they knew. I tried not to, but they couldn't control themselves. Its okay, though, because I think I have just openend up a whole new world for myself!

Behold, the coffee mug! (picture's a tad blurry)

Now I'm looking all over the place for crap to paint! I need to go find some big metal pieces to paint on! I need to find some old car hoods! (Perhaps I should start small and visit my local restaurant supply for some old trays.)

Who knows? Maybe someday I'll be gigantically famous! I doubt that highly, but a girl can dream!

Look out world, here comes Robyn! She can't pinstripe for shit but she's got paint and she ain't affraid to use it!!

Why.....

IS ALL THE GOOD SHIT BAD FOR YOU?!?!?

I got a wild hair late this morning on my way to work to try the new Iced Coffee at McDonalds. A large one, at that, with caramel in it.

I got curious (after I decided it was so yummy and making my hair dance so fantastically - I feel like a million bucks) and I HAD to know the fat content.

So I Googled it.

Large, with caramel: 11 grams of fat. !!!!!

Damn it! And I was gonna get another one tomorrow. What a bummer. I can't waste fat grams on a beverage, even though its a super yummy treat that makes me feel like I can leap tall buildings in a single bound! Phooey.

Oh, Boy, I forgot about these...

The Grandpa-isms.

Bless his heart, Jim's Grandpa has a way of making up his own words instead of using the real ones, especially if he can't pronounce it. And I swear he knows he's doing it because when you try to get him to say it again for someone else so you can all laugh at him, he's got you figured out. Poor little hillbilly.

Salolomonty - He means Salmonella. He was also overheard calling it "That chicken disease."

Virgo - He's referring to vertigo, which Aunt Bonnie, the flight attendant has and can't work because it "makes her real spinny"

Dr. Joyce Brotherton - I shit you not, he means Dr. Ruth. (don't even ask me to explain that one.) He's thinking of Dr. Joyce Brothers.

There are a guzillion more, but here's my favorite phrase....I just about pee every time he says it:
"I MADE EXTRY!" - He means he made extra, as in mashed potatoes, iced tea....you name it.

I forgot to blog about this when I uploaded my vacation photos.

** TWO MORE I FORGOT ABOUT!**

Flustrated - I believe this to be a combination of flustered and frustrated - I hate to admit this, but my country bumpkin husband says it sometimes too. Makes me want to hit him.

This last one is a visual - and I am not kidding at all about this: "Blowney" - (bologna) grandpa wrote this on his grocery list. I nearly fell out of my chair when he said, "Well, I just wrote it like it sounds."

A Little More Vacation Stuff.

I managed to get a shot of the giant Sam Houston statue on the way out of the Houston area from the car. Damn I'm good. (thanks Heather for pointing out my Houston oopsies)

Need a casket shaped like an onion? Yeah, me neither, but now you can say you've seen one. Yep, thats a fish casket behind it. And if you look real close, there's Jimbo hangin' out behind the chicken casket, getting a look at the giant outboard motor casket.
We saw an exact replica of King Tut's sarcophagus at the Museum of Funeral History - it was pretty awesome. Not sure if I spelled that right. This old hand painted ambulance/hearse sign was pretty cool, too. Attached to it at the bottom is an old matchbook with the same logo. We saw A LOT of hearses at the museum. Many of them were of the horse drawn kind, some from Germany. They were fabulous and beautiful. Creepy, but beautiful.
Oh, yeah - Jim's Aunt Bonnie turned 53 on the 3rd - she doesn't look it! She's a flight attendant, blonde, gorgeous......its just sick. But she's so sweet, you can't hate her for being a living Barbie Doll!
This morning I had my very first mamogram. Interesting. I'm a bit uptight about it, but won't get official word for a week or so - they showed me the pictures they took this morning - large mass in lefty - kinda freaked me out.

On top of that, they have strapped a stupid-ass heart monitor on me that cannot come off for 24 hours - it looks ridiculous, and I can't shower till they take it off, which will be right before work in the morning. Great stuff. Tomorrow may be a bandana day if things don't go well.

What I Learned on My Summer Vacation.

Well, I'm back from my trip to Texas. It was too long! I'm exhausted.

I did learn some stuff and saw some pretty interesting things. On Friday we visited The National Museum of Funeral History. It was way down in Huston. I'll blog more about that later.

So in no particluar order, here are some things I learned on the trip:

(this one is VERY important) Whataburger: your last chance for it on the way home
is Ardmore, Oklahoma.

(is it just me or is that the old Wichita Wings logo?)

Taking it with you: Apparently, you really can.

T-Ball: not everything in Texas is bigger.
(they were so TINY!)

Caskets that look like chickens:
HYSTERICAL

Caskets that look like eagles:
remotely humorous if you work where I work.

Childrens hearse from Germany:
Beautiful, but not funny.

My nephew: planning a trip to the outer reaches of our universe with a Buzz Lightyear Halloween costume, a Jr. Astronaut helmet, some gardenening gloves and

his mother's house slippers.

My new niece: ADORABLE!

Embalming: appears to have started during the Civil War.

Old painting of my father: shipped to my brother by our aunts, and
my brother won't let me have it.

Later I will blog a little about the trip to the funeral museum. It wask kinda creepy, but interesting as hell! The stay at Jim's grandparents in Garland, Texas was good. The weather was great till we got to Huston to visit my brother and his family - there, the weather was rainy and humid. I swear I'm the only person to LOSE a tan on vacation.